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Solo Dating 101

by Nyjah J.




Most people can vividly remember their first crush. Mine was in kindergarten and I thought he was amazing. Looking back on every crush I have ever had (there have been many), I have never named myself as one of them. I know that may sound strange but, think about it. We think so highly of the people we crush on (justifiably or not) but, rarely do we come across someone that thinks those things of them self. I think it is time we change that and I've got just the thing to do that...Solo Dating. Like any other dating there are stages in this relationship, four to be exact.


Stage 1: Get to know you

Like any other relationship you should get to know the person your interested in. What you like, what don't like. What are your hopes? Your fears? This stage is very important because it will be the foundation upon which you'll start your relationship and a place to discover who you are within this relationship.


Stage 2: Woo yourself

In this stage you should buy yourself things that you like, flowers, jewelry, anything that makes your heart flutter. Do whatever makes you feel special. A second part of this stage may seem crazy but, it is important. Take yourself out on a date. I'm serious. Maybe this date is dinner and movie or going to an art museum but, you have to go alone. No friends. No dates. Just you and the silence. The more you do it the less uncomfortable it will feel and more you'll have fun. And sooner or later you'll have full blown crush.


Stage 3: Take things to next level

In this stage you should just live your life the way you usually would but, keep yourself in mind. Treat yourself like you treat a crush. Make sure you are being affectionate to yourself. Make sure you are still doing the things that gave you butterflies in the first place. Make sure you are really paying attention to your wants and needs. One day, you will look up and it will be different. You won't see yourself as you use. You will begin to see the beauty in the little things you do. You will have fallen in love with you and realized how important and special you are. Then it happens you utter those three words, "I love you."


Stage 4: Working on it.

Though real love doesn't fade away, things like affection and romance do. Remember, it is important to keep working on loving yourself everyday as much as possible because love can not sustain it's self. It takes work. It takes effort. Some days will be easy, a piece of cake, and some days will be hard and make you question everything you've been working toward but it is important that you don't give up on yourself.


These stages are not easy I know from experience that they aren't but, I also know they are worth it. Dating yourself can bring a level of love to your life that you truly need.

Most people can vividly remember their first crush. Mine was in kindergarten and I thought he was amazing. Looking back on every crush I have ever had (there have been many), I have never named myself as one of them. I know that may sound strange but, think about it. We think so highly of the people we crush on (justifiably or not) but, rarely do we come across someone that thinks those things of them self. I think it is time we change that and I've got just the thing to do that...Solo Dating. Like any other dating there are stages in this relationship, four to be exact.


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